Tuesday, February 10, 2009

What Happens To You After A Divorce?

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By Ras Reed

There are events that occur in our lives that impact us greatly. For some individuals, this impact may result to negative change and for others, a positive change follows close on the heels of a drastic event. Whether you want to or not, the facts that a divorce changes you. It truly is your decision if that change is good or bad.

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For some human beings, a divorce makes them feel less of the people that they are supposed to be. If you are like that, you will most likely spend you time focusing on your weak points and rehashing past events. Doing this is only going to get you stuck in one place without the hope of moving forward. Others become broody and vengeful. Their former sweet dispositions are tainted by the pollution of a divorce because they let it and they can spend their whole life plotting revenge and wallowing in self pity. Others may go on a binge, eating everything within sight.

Some individuals have been known to throw in the towel, withdrawn from the society and become recluses till they die. All these changes are negative and will do you absolutely no good. To let your divorce change you positively do the following;

Accept: Accept the fact that bad things do take place and some times, the fact that you maybe a good person doesn't exempt you from that. Also, accept the fact that you played your own role to the best of your ability and forgive yourself for those times that you did not give in your best.

Embrace: Embrace life, friends and families, don't depart from any of these. Bowing out of the social scene can have a wrong impact on you.

Change yourself: Get a new wardrobe, haircut or body. Go out and do those things that being married kept you from doing. Dye your hair the color of fire or wear sexy dresses to a dinner with friends every night. Doing something that is not in line with what you would have commonly done can give you a boost in confidence and give you enough reason to live.

Hope: Don't ever lose hope. Once you still feel the flutter of hope in your chest, you grasp you can come through a divorce strong and beautiful.

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Article originally published on How To Get Your Ex Back article

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