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A very sad but true fact is that many people are completely blindsided by their spouse asking for a divorce. Oh sure, they were aware that the marriage was shaky, but had no idea that their spouse was considering ending the marriage. Here are five things that signal you need to really take a hard look at your marriage or risk having it end.
1. Having the same argument time and time again. Do the same issues keep cropping up only to prompt yet another heated argument? Maybe one or both of you storm off in anger instead of staying to work on the problem. Issues that are left unresolved are like ticking time bombs, you are never sure when they might explode.
2. Avoiding conversation. Do you turn on the television or the computer or open up a book as a way to avoid having to talk to your spouse? Avoiding talking to your spouse about the problems won't make them disappear. Lack of communication is a major marriage problem.
3. A void of physical intimacy. Do you put off or shy away from physical intimacy? Humans have a natural desire for physical closeness. One of the major things that sets a marriage apart from any other relationship is physical intimacy. Without a physical relationship, you might as well be living with a friend or a sibling.
4. Criticizing everything. Maybe your spouse is not perfect, but neither are you. Constant criticism is not only demeaning, but it is disrespectful, as well. Most people are already self-conscious of their own issues, and no one enjoys having them pointed out by someone else. Constant criticism can make a spouse shut down, tuning out your voice whenever you start to talk.
5. Letting your marriage sink to the bottom of the priority list. Do you remember how you always wanted to spend every minute together in the beginning of you relationship? That behavior is completely normal, and most couples will find a way to settle into a balanced lifestyle shortly after. Problems begin to occur when the marriage and your spouse start to become less important than other things in life.
If any of the warning signs I have talked about hit a little too close to home, I strongly suggest you begin turning things around. Problems in marriages cannot fix themselves. By leaving problems alone, and not dealing with them, you only make things worse. Blaming your spouse will not fix the problems, either. Even though saving a marriage can be hard work, your relationship is worth the effort.
1. Having the same argument time and time again. Do the same issues keep cropping up only to prompt yet another heated argument? Maybe one or both of you storm off in anger instead of staying to work on the problem. Issues that are left unresolved are like ticking time bombs, you are never sure when they might explode.
2. Avoiding conversation. Do you turn on the television or the computer or open up a book as a way to avoid having to talk to your spouse? Avoiding talking to your spouse about the problems won't make them disappear. Lack of communication is a major marriage problem.
3. A void of physical intimacy. Do you put off or shy away from physical intimacy? Humans have a natural desire for physical closeness. One of the major things that sets a marriage apart from any other relationship is physical intimacy. Without a physical relationship, you might as well be living with a friend or a sibling.
4. Criticizing everything. Maybe your spouse is not perfect, but neither are you. Constant criticism is not only demeaning, but it is disrespectful, as well. Most people are already self-conscious of their own issues, and no one enjoys having them pointed out by someone else. Constant criticism can make a spouse shut down, tuning out your voice whenever you start to talk.
5. Letting your marriage sink to the bottom of the priority list. Do you remember how you always wanted to spend every minute together in the beginning of you relationship? That behavior is completely normal, and most couples will find a way to settle into a balanced lifestyle shortly after. Problems begin to occur when the marriage and your spouse start to become less important than other things in life.
If any of the warning signs I have talked about hit a little too close to home, I strongly suggest you begin turning things around. Problems in marriages cannot fix themselves. By leaving problems alone, and not dealing with them, you only make things worse. Blaming your spouse will not fix the problems, either. Even though saving a marriage can be hard work, your relationship is worth the effort.
About the Author:
If you recognize these marriage problem signs in your marriage, you need a solid plan for how to save a failing marriage. With a solid plan you can then begin the journey to a successful, happy marriage. Visit http://www.mydistantlove.com to learn more.
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